"So Long, Insecurity"

I started reading Beth Moore's new book, "So Long, Insecurity". I admit, I only bought it and started reading it because some friends at church wanted to start a discussion group on it. I even commented to one of them on Sunday that insecurity was not really something that I struggled with, but I was looking forward to the discussion.

Wow. I am continually amazed at how books like this can make us aware of things that we don't typically take the time to notice in ourselves. Some of the things I am realizing already are things that I would have never "labeled" as insecure. There are two passages that really hit home with me, especially after the amazing series we just completed at The Orchard, called "What Jim Said".

From Beth Moore's book - "Just when I'm feeling all secure, like I'm God's best friend, an earthquake splits that lofty mountain right down the middle. And boy, am I dismayed. I have a feeling we can never get so secure in ourselves that we cannot be moved. Can a rock ever move forward?

Is the goal of the believing life to get to a place where we simply hold steady till we die? Maybe that's part of my problem. Maybe I just get bored easily. I'm forever wanting to go someplace with God. I forget that in order to really want to go, something has to happen to make me want to leave where I am. Maybe we're all just sick to death of taking three steps forward and two steps back. Call me a math wizard, but isn't that still one step forward? Isn't that still some pretty big progress as we run against the hurricane winds of a godless culture? And if we don't lose that ground, aren't we on our way somewhere new? Willing to take three more steps - even if we lose two?"

Here's the other one - " Perhaps, like me, somewhere deep inside you entertain the lie that you know yourself better than God kows you and that you've somehow successfully hidden something from His omniscient eye. This could be the only explanation for why He bothers with you. For those of us who try to live in the light of Scripture, this thought process is far more subtle than outright. Roots always extend underground. Sometimes, the only way we know one of these roots exists is when we see what's growing from it. If we have false assumptions like, "If God really knew me, he wouldn't like me" hidden somewhere in our core, it will feed our insecurities like a zookeeper shoveling hay to an elephant. We only know that assumption is there because something big, alive, and destructive is growing from it."

Wow. I've been thinking about these passages for the last few days. Very insightful!

Thank you for sponsoring me!

Happy New Year! A huge thank you to those of you who sponsored my weight loss through the end of 2009. I am happy about being 11 pounds down going into the year! I appreciate all of your love and support!

Well, tomorrow is my birthday. As each year passes, I find it hard to believe that I am in my late 30s and quickly approaching the big 4-0 in a few years. But, it really doesn't bother me as much as I expected it to. In fact, this year, I have to say that I am happier than I have been in a long time. I have made significant personal and spiritual shifts in my thinking and behavior this year that have helped me to have an even better outlook on my life. I can look back, specifically on the last few years, and truly see how I have learned significant things through the challenges that have been put in front of me. It is never easy during the time, but I know that I am a better person for having perservered through the difficulties.

I am extremely grateful to have an amazing God who loves me, an awesome family, and more good friends than I deserve. I am thankful that I am at a point in my life where I truly appreciate what I have, and continue to push myself to be a better wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, professional, etc.

Thank you to all of you who hold a very special place in my heart. I appreciate every one of you more than I can ever express!
Here's to an amazing 2010!

Still plugging along

Well, somehow life has gotten crazy over the last few weeks, and I haven't had a chance to post. I'll admit that Thanksgiving time was harder for me than I thought it would be in regards to eating healthy! I definitely got off track a little bit, but I am back on track. I realize that I often do this in many areas of my life. I get really excited about something and work really hard at it, then slack off a little bit and struggle. It's just confirmation that most things require a lot of hard work, dedication, and the ability to pick yourself back up when you've had setbacks. Luckily, I am committed to making this a lifestyle change, and want to get healthier. I am thankful for all of you who have been encouraging me and continue to be positive reinforcement.

I am now down 11 pounds and 8 inches. Definitely not as far along as I would have liked to have been, but I am happy with my progress. I want to raise as much money as I can to help hungry children. I have had several opportunities recently to be exposed to organizations that help care for children in need. What an amazing experience. I am so incredibly grateful for everything we have, and the fact that my kids don't have to worry about when and if they will eat that day. The fact that there are children all over the world, and even right here in our area, who worry about that continually just breaks my heart.

So, I will continue on my journey until the 31st to see how much I can raise to help them. Thank you for your continued support.

Three Weeks Done

Well, it has now been three weeks, and I've lost another 2 pounds. That brings my total up to 9 pounds! I am definitely feeling better, and starting to feel the difference in my clothes.

I have to say that this has really been an incredible experience for me. I have gotten so much support from those of you I've seen in person, as well as through email. I honesty am looking at this whole weight loss challenge through different eyes, thanks to Larry's idea of including the pledges. I am really trying to be more missionally focused, and this is definitely helping.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I am so thankful for a wonderful family, friends, and my health. I have so much to be thankful for. Thank you for sharing in this journey. Have a great Thanksgiving!

Update on Losing To Give

Check out this great update from my friend, Larry, on our combined efforts for Losing to Give. Very exciting!!

http://larryboatright.wordpress.com/

Week Two is Complete!

So, I finished week two and I am down TWO more pounds. I also keep track of inches that I am losing. I always find this to be just as motivational as the scale for me. In two weeks, I have lost over 6 inches. I'm definitely starting to notice a difference in how my clothes feel.

Last week was a little tougher, as I found myself wanting to cheat a little bit. However, I am really focusing on keeping this as a health transformation, and not a diet. I am eating more vegetables, making healthier choices, and moving much more! I will post more details about some of the approaches I am taking later this week.

Again, thank you for all of those supporting me. I am up to $14/pound, which is excellent! I still have room for sponsors, so feel free to fill out the form or just contact me directly with your pledge.

The more weight I lose, the more hungry children are fed! I love that!

Week one - Done!

Well, the first week is over, and I am down 5 pounds! I feel so good, and I am happy with my progress so far. I have been eating better, moving more, and taking a completely different approach to my health. Thank you for all of your support, both in pledges, and in your kind words and encouragement!