I started reading Beth Moore's new book, "So Long, Insecurity". I admit, I only bought it and started reading it because some friends at church wanted to start a discussion group on it. I even commented to one of them on Sunday that insecurity was not really something that I struggled with, but I was looking forward to the discussion.
Wow. I am continually amazed at how books like this can make us aware of things that we don't typically take the time to notice in ourselves. Some of the things I am realizing already are things that I would have never "labeled" as insecure. There are two passages that really hit home with me, especially after the amazing series we just completed at The Orchard, called "What Jim Said".
From Beth Moore's book - "Just when I'm feeling all secure, like I'm God's best friend, an earthquake splits that lofty mountain right down the middle. And boy, am I dismayed. I have a feeling we can never get so secure in ourselves that we cannot be moved. Can a rock ever move forward?
Is the goal of the believing life to get to a place where we simply hold steady till we die? Maybe that's part of my problem. Maybe I just get bored easily. I'm forever wanting to go someplace with God. I forget that in order to really want to go, something has to happen to make me want to leave where I am. Maybe we're all just sick to death of taking three steps forward and two steps back. Call me a math wizard, but isn't that still one step forward? Isn't that still some pretty big progress as we run against the hurricane winds of a godless culture? And if we don't lose that ground, aren't we on our way somewhere new? Willing to take three more steps - even if we lose two?"
Here's the other one - " Perhaps, like me, somewhere deep inside you entertain the lie that you know yourself better than God kows you and that you've somehow successfully hidden something from His omniscient eye. This could be the only explanation for why He bothers with you. For those of us who try to live in the light of Scripture, this thought process is far more subtle than outright. Roots always extend underground. Sometimes, the only way we know one of these roots exists is when we see what's growing from it. If we have false assumptions like, "If God really knew me, he wouldn't like me" hidden somewhere in our core, it will feed our insecurities like a zookeeper shoveling hay to an elephant. We only know that assumption is there because something big, alive, and destructive is growing from it."
Wow. I've been thinking about these passages for the last few days. Very insightful!